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The wife experiment: he is not my son

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Monday, December 20, 2010

The wife experiment: he is not my son

It's not really my job to mother my husband is it? He has his own mother. Besides, he is 23 years old, he a is a grown up, he doesn't actually need someone telling him what to do. Poor Corey. I have turned into one of THOSE women who once they become a mother they start trying to mother, well everybody really.

I'm not sure when it started, but over the last few weeks I have been noticing it more and more. It's one thing to call the fifteen year old checkout boy "sweetheart or darling", it's not too offensive to say "careful, it's hot" when handing a cup of coffee to my mother in law. I can probably even get away with saying "message me when you get home" when a visitor heads for their car at the end of a long day.

What is not ok is to treat Corey like a child. Just yesterday we had, "have you eaten breakfast?", "do you really need another coke?", (which reminds me of something I have uttered too frequently in the past, "coke is not a, breakfast food sweetheart"), "if you lick that bowl of chocolate now you won't be able to sleep tonight" (we were making Christmas chocolates at 9 pm), and "don't stay up too late" when he went to the spare room to play games because surprise surprise he couldn't sleep. Then the embarassment really hits when I realise I went in, interupting his game, to ask in all earnesty, "have you brushed your teeth?"

He has made it very tempting for me, mind you. Surprise surprise he was up most of the night and slept through Alexis waking up this morning and crying her head off while I changed her nappy. I went to check why he wasn't up when his alarm should have gone off, to find he set it back half an hour. I accidentally woke him up. I respond to the "huh?" not with "just wanting to make sure you have an alarm on", which was the truth, but instead, "when you get up put your bottles and tissues in the bin, this room is disgusting!"

I do not know what comes over me, is it hormonal, is it instinct, but I have become a bit of a control freak. *shock!* There was no reason Corey needed to be up. Alexis is asleep and he is still going to get ready on time. Even if he wasn't, as he is an adult capable of making his own decisions, I should leave him be. Free to make his own decisions, he should also be free to accept the consequences. If he wants to pig out, stay up too late, then sleep in and rush around and possibly skip breakfast, that is his decision. Even if he forgets to brush his teeth, I am sure he'll be fine.

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