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Thursday, January 6, 2011

Oops I did it again

So it turns out I should think before I act. But if I thought much harder I would never do anything. I think a little too much, I think that's my problem. This blog was meant to be fun and educational and a way to de-stress, but all I've ended up doing is hurting people I care about and making a fool of myself.

I promised when I started writing this that I would write an honest and open account of my thoughts and feelings. I don't do things by halves, I'm sorry, that's just who I am. When I write I sometimes allow my mind to rush ahead and I go on tangents. This is my 'style' and is what attracts people to my writing. I think its rawness is the basis of its appeal. When I get in the zone though I can't always comprehend the potential consequences.

I probably shouldn't have put that last post up. It was ill timing and I should not have gone there... I did put it up, because I had spent too long on it to not put it up. It was not my intention to vilify this young couple. I apologise, from my heart, if it came across that way. I was intending for it to turn out differently. I am sure there are other parents out there who have experienced similar dilemmas and I was trying to write something genuine they can identify with.

This whole thing has led me to question whether I should keep going on this blog endeavour or not. I shouldn't blog in the early hours of the morning, but then I'd never get a chance. If I re-read everything too thoroughly before I post it I would never post anything because I feel like everything I write is rubbish and it is hard to write things without offending at least somebody. Despite that I have been contacted by several people saying they enjoy reading it, from young ladies wondering what it's like with kids, to people who's babies are all grown up, and other mums who need to know that they are not alone. So what do you think? Should I give up and delete my blog? Or should I keep going?

I have decided, definitely, that I will no longer be posting links to this blog on facebook. This will reduce my viewer numbers but it should also limit the trouble I get myself into. If you have been relying on facebook links please find other ways to stay in touch. If you would like to email me at I will happily add your email address to a mail-out list to notify you of updates (once I set it up).


At January 6, 2011 at 12:11 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

keep going!!

At January 6, 2011 at 12:21 PM , Blogger Nicole Harry said...

Keep writing Karlee. The joys of putting yourself out there also means that sometimes you will get a kick in the arse! I read your last post and I didn't think you said anything offensive. It is a situation that many parents have to deal with and you only presented your side of it, you can't write about how others feel. You're doing well. Keep going

At January 6, 2011 at 5:04 PM , Blogger tiffa said...

Keep writing I say! You didn't mention any names in the last post, there was nothing offensive. You were just writing candidly about how you having a child affected where you go or don't go. It wasn't aimed at them it just tells how they influenced your decision to not go and it's your right to turn down any invitation - regardless of your reason.

At January 7, 2011 at 12:43 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep writing. From the sounds of this apology it would seem that they have said something to you or made you write one. If that is the case then it simply paints them in a bad light and further emphisises the fact that they are guilty.

Keep writing I really enjoy looking back and having fond memories of my children growing up from reading you blogs Karlee.

Thanks for all the effort you put in and stuff this couple, they dont seem like nice people anyway.

Just my opinion, Megan

At January 7, 2011 at 5:58 AM , Blogger The Mother Experiment said...

Thank you all for your support.

Nicole, you are very encouraging. I'm glad I stumbled across your blog. I hope I can be as cool as you when I have a few more years ahead.

Tiffa, I'm glad that you have interpreted it the way it was meant to. Thank you

Megan, great to know you enjoy reading this. Do you have a blog of your own? If you do I'd love to have a look. I am interested in who reads my blog, especially people I haven't met. But please know It was my choice to write this and mine alone. They are not bad people, just under a lot of stress. Stress affects us all.

At January 12, 2011 at 11:23 PM , Anonymous vanessa said...

i normally read ur blog entries via fb on my phone but due to the phone i have i only get the blog content and cant comment or anything. so, i have made a special trip to my laptop just so i can comment. i think you should keep your blog going. for one reason, i enjoy it. secondly, i think you need it as an outlet for your thoughts and feelings.
i would love to keep reading it through fb but if you do choose not to post it through fb that is your choice and i respect that. but do remember, if people get offended they dont need to click on your post and read it. that is their choice to make and you cant be blamed for people getting offended if they choose to read YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS. right?

I thoroughly enjoy reading your blog. i dont know all that much about babies and what its like to have one. actually, i am quite scared whether i will ever be ready to handle it. and i feel i am getting 'prepared' (in some crazy way) for what to expect. as it wont be that long before we decide to have a mini me. and then i'm gonna need all the info i can get!!! aaargh. PLUS, i like your honest writing style and find it entertaining. :-) keep it up Karlee. dont change a thing

At January 12, 2011 at 11:32 PM , Anonymous vanessa said...

oh and secondly i know whose wedding it was. Megan, they really are lovely people, and i didnt read it as them being talked about badly in the slightest so i dont think you or them should worry. you are both good people and i can see both sides. and to throw it out there i agree with both child-free and child-friendly weddings. (i am most likely having a child-free wedding myself). at the end of the day it is their wedding and needs to reflect them and what they want. if they dont have kids (like me) chances are that they might not be able to deal with children running around as they arent used to it. and not that Alexis would be running around at all, but i believe if they have told some people they cant bring children then i think is it right to have the same rule for everyone. yeah?
well thats my 2 cents anyway :-)

At January 13, 2011 at 12:01 AM , Blogger The Mother Experiment said...

Hey Vanessa,
Thanks for your lovely comments. I totally understand the appeal of a child-free wedding. Corey and I joked about having one ourselves, but we didn't because we love my gazillion baby cousins. Weddings are not exactly baby-friendly. I had no intention of taking bub without their permission or even if they said yes but I knew they didn't want babies. which is why I asked rather than just turning up with her on the day. I didn't mind them not wanting her there, I just wasn't going without her, so I wasn't going, and I told them so. I didn't see a problem with that. My point in writing the post (if I'd written it more carefully I might have got it across better) was:

People without kids please don't be offended if friends with kids choose not to attend your function to which their child is not invited. It does not mean that they do not want to go or that they don't like you, it probably means they can't find or afford a babysitter or that they just don't want to leave their child (they have a right to say this). They possibly feel worried about upsetting you so try not to dismiss their decision.

At January 13, 2011 at 12:18 AM , Blogger The Mother Experiment said...

Ps Ness, if I may make a suggestion... If you want friends to attend without their offspring try to give them plenty of notice so they can organise someone to look after them. We did not have long at all between receiving the invite and the rsvp date. If we had more time we could have had a "trial run" of Alexis being babysat for a longer time but with us closer to home. Of course it depends on the age of the kids and how well you know your guests, but just something to think about.


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